In the Office - Part 3
Don't get me wrong. My boss is a genius. I know because I gave him the WRAT. That’s W-R-A-T, Wide Range Achievement Test, not a rodent. He scored off the scale. But he’s also a child psychiatrist. Imagine a genius with a kid's sense of humor.
He likes Ren and Stimpy and Beavis and Butthead. So you can imagine what I have to put up with. He found out that I have a strong gag reflex. So he would come up behind me and start to drool, then suck it back in. Gag! Another doctor (an adult psychiatrist) told me to just ignore him and he would stop. “Oh, sure,” I said, “after he drools on my head a few times!”
Or take this kind of abuse: One time I was standing there, trying to talk to him.
He started looking in my ear, looking really intently. Then he started waving to another doctor who was standing on the other side of me (an adolescent psychiatrist), as if he could see him through my head, as if there was nothing to block the view. Then the other doctor looked in my other ear and started waving back. Then they straightened up and looked serious, walking around me. “Hmmm,” he said, “What do you think, doctor? Lobotomy?” Then, in unison, they said “How would you tell?”
But sometimes he’s cute. He loves animals. He has two dogs, and a cat, and 30 guinea pigs! They’re like family to him, and to us, too. That’s why when two of them of the pigs got married, one of the ladies in the office sewed a wedding dress and a tuxedo for them. Oh, you don’t believe me! Well, I have pictures. This is Matilda and Melvin.
He likes Ren and Stimpy and Beavis and Butthead. So you can imagine what I have to put up with. He found out that I have a strong gag reflex. So he would come up behind me and start to drool, then suck it back in. Gag! Another doctor (an adult psychiatrist) told me to just ignore him and he would stop. “Oh, sure,” I said, “after he drools on my head a few times!”
Or take this kind of abuse: One time I was standing there, trying to talk to him.
He started looking in my ear, looking really intently. Then he started waving to another doctor who was standing on the other side of me (an adolescent psychiatrist), as if he could see him through my head, as if there was nothing to block the view. Then the other doctor looked in my other ear and started waving back. Then they straightened up and looked serious, walking around me. “Hmmm,” he said, “What do you think, doctor? Lobotomy?” Then, in unison, they said “How would you tell?”
But sometimes he’s cute. He loves animals. He has two dogs, and a cat, and 30 guinea pigs! They’re like family to him, and to us, too. That’s why when two of them of the pigs got married, one of the ladies in the office sewed a wedding dress and a tuxedo for them. Oh, you don’t believe me! Well, I have pictures. This is Matilda and Melvin.
posted by Marianne at 9:06 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home